Let us take a moment to appreciate the unsung hero of our age: the idiot. The idiot is a remarkable creature, one whose talent for confidently misunderstanding the world is unmatched. Unlike the rest of us, burdened by reason, facts, and critical thinking, the idiot strides boldly into the fray, armed with nothing but hubris and a pocketful of nonsense.
In politics, the idiot is a beacon of hope. While the wise grapple with complexities, the idiot offers us simple solutions—so simple, in fact, that they barely resemble reality. “Why bother with diplomacy when we can shout louder?” the idiot asks. “Why read history when we can rewrite it as we go?” The idiot, you see, is a master of shortcuts. Who needs competence when charisma will do?
In governance, the idiot truly shines. Policies? Overrated. Planning? A waste of time. Instead, the idiot embraces chaos, believing firmly that the louder the announcement, the better the outcome. “Why fix a problem,” the idiot wonders, “when I can just blame it on someone else?” Indeed, the idiot is a virtuoso of deflection, a maestro of scapegoating. If you ask the idiot why the economy is in shambles, they’ll tell you it’s because of the opposition, the weather, or, better yet, the alignment of the stars.
The idiot is also a gift to international relations. Where others see nuance, the idiot sees an opportunity to insult, to provoke, to escalate. “Why collaborate when I can alienate?” the idiot muses. And let us not forget their unparalleled ability to make enemies out of allies. Who needs friends when you can rule a kingdom of burned bridges?
But the idiot’s greatest strength lies in their ability to inspire. They inspire us to lower our expectations, to accept mediocrity as the new standard, and to laugh—because, really, what else can we do? The idiot teaches us that the world is not run by the best and brightest, but by those who shout the loudest and think the least.
So let us raise a toast to the idiot, the unsung architect of our confusion. May their reign be long, their speeches be incoherent, and their legacy be one of unparalleled absurdity. After all, in a world where the blind lead the blind, it is the idiot who holds the megaphone